I'm trying my best to stay away from the house because I really despise the sight of packed boxes as they're getting ready to be loaded onto the lorry. Slight guilt overtakes me whenever I see my sister help my father load the boxes up, but I'm not emotionally prepared for this.

I'm currently at a place where I have yet to share with anybody. Many have come to this place to chill and enjoy the scenery. I could easily invite anyone here and just spend the day with them here and waste the day staring into the open space of natural beauty. Problem is I wouldn't want to be of annoyance to anyone if I do invite them here because it'll always be spontaneous.

Sad thing is that I never got the chance to take even my ex here to enjoy this.. but I know now that it's somewhat of a good thing because I really do want to share this spot with someone closest to my heart.

I've exposed too much on Tinychat last night, but surprisingly I never did mention who she is and some actually do know of her. It is quite scary come to think of it.

I know that I can only seem more pleasant in the eyes of others if I show that I'm a jolly optimistic fellow, but sadness will always prevail. I do enjoy the company of others, but when I'm into someone, the rest of the world doesn't seem to exist.

I'm lonely by choice, and I hate myself for that because I told myself that I will wait for someone no matter what. 

"How long.." They asked. I was left speechless with nothing to back it up.

Am I willing enough to wait that long for an uncertain future? Is the inevitable heartbreak really worth it? Will the journey be a fruitful one?

I've found a cheat in life that precedes me to have a slight thought at a chance of being sane again - and that is to write down how I feel. I know there are eager ears out there, but the words I share to a foreign ear will never be as accurate as the words I type/write down.

I really wish I could tell you readers more, but there's something holding me back. I'll wait and wait.... for how long? I remain silent.

To my extreme left, a girl and a guy playing a game as I recall it to be, "chopsticks"

To my extreme right, a group of people huddling trying to capture the "1, 2, 3 all jump, freeze in the air" photo..

Infront of me, an imaginary person, with her head tilted down reading her book intently, eyes glistening ever so brightly. With her fringe flowing down her noggin, falling flawlessly over her brows. I'm defeated by the bundle of papers she holds in her hand. I've lost her for a couple of minutes but she suddenly clutched the book to her chest and holds back a weep. 

She finally collects herself and talks to me about the characters as if they're actually real, because for a moment, they were real in her eyes.

The moment I would love to share with her dearly.